it’s never going to be fair.
Published 03-19-2009 on my old wordpress blog.

So this is how adulthood is: finding ways to deal with everything.

First, some tragic news for my BFF. My heart goes out to her and I wish I could express that I’m sorry for everyone involved.

Then, I was reading the Vinyl Collective RSS feed and found out that Chris Wollard’s ex-fiancee was murdered. This shouldn’t affect me, because he’s just the singer from one of my top five bands ever (Hot Water Music), not a real person. But my brain doesn’t work like it’s supposed to and things like this tend to affect me stronger than they should. I start to wonder what would happen if my ex-almost-fiancee would be murdered. I think I would take that news badly.

Mike Hale (who’s new column about quitting everything and playing music I’ve been following) wrote about this tragedy from a more personal standpoint. One that might get across some tiny bit of the feelings I’m feeling for people I’ve never met, just because they remind me of myself. You should read it.

I’m going to embed the same video here, because it represents a strength of character I someday hope I can achieve. Because If I heard you died … well, I wouldn’t recover from that blow. It is just a simple little song without overly deep lyrics, but you can tell it’s way more than that.

“Over Mine” by Chris Wollard 3/17/09

The shaking deep inside
my heart builds up at night
in waves that slowly rise
and crash out of me.

and flames of rage find life
and tears of pain they fly
from streams that never dry.

So, i remember,
your hand over mine,
your body over mine,
taking our sweet time.

I lay awake with my,
Big windows open wide,
and wait there for a sign
so i can slip away.

but questions seem to fly
on wings that never tire

of love after we die

So, i remember,
your hands over mine,
and your body over mine
taking our sweet time.

Mr. Wollard, I’m sorry. And, though it doesn’t help, I think I understand. We should all be lucky enough to find such beautiful ways to wage our war against the sorrows of everyday life.

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Keywords: what was that cure song again?

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